Certainties & Maybes

I love certainty. If I am being entirely honest, I also love being right!

You know that feeling of ‘I know what to do here’ but people disregard you, don’t listen and then it turns out you were right?! And you are there thinking ‘I knew that all along!😏

But being right is not always right. I notice a need to be right as we age. I am not sure if it is the frustration of ‘young people’ or the desire to be heard.

Regardless of why, I have been experimenting lately with ‘maybe’. Maybe keeps me curious. Maybe means possibly but not certainly. Possibility is something I am keen on! Possibility thinking is the willingness to see possibilities everywhere instead of limitations.

As a recovering people-pleaser and potential know-it-all - ‘maybe’ is a great place for me to live. It creates space and possibility. Space for me to consider if I want to do something, space for me to consider if there is another way, space to consider someone else’s perspective.

We all have some knowledge and some power. Too many people assume the extremes of having no knowledge or power or all the knowledge and power! Why do people talk so much like they absolutely know? And why do people say they absolutely can do something when they’re just guessing if they can? Why is "maybe" so hard for us?

Humans love certainty. Many of us find uncertainty stressful. We think that control and knowing things will help us feel relaxed. In my experience, control makes us tighten up. Surrendering control and having faith is difficult at first but feels amazing when you are in it. Having faith in yourself, having faith in the people around you, and knowing that the world supports you is my version of faith.

One thing I know for sure is that I am certain about myself. I am a sure thing! I am clever, resourceful, intuitive, and have loads of experience. Experience in life. As my friend Leslie wrote in my 50th birthday card, “Congratulations you are old enough to know some stuff and young enough to do something with it.”

I'd rather be a could-be if I cannot be an are; 
because a could-be is a maybe who is reaching for a star. 
I'd rather be a has-been than a might-have-been, by far; 
for a might-have-been has never been, 
but a has was once an are. 
Milton Berle